I am 48, female and have a long term male partner.

I am being treated for "depression" but think the underlying cause is
Asperger's.

I have been on long-term sick leave from my current job due to
bullying, ostracism, stress and overwork.

I want to get my life back where I do not have to take medication for
depression.

In 1984 I was diagnosed with a "nervous breakdown" and was subjected
to E.C.T. within a week of admission to hospital. I spent years
gettinng over this and weaning myself off the heavy medication. I was
clear of medication from 1986 to 1994 so I CAN exist without it.

I love the sea, maps and geography and railways and have a B.Sc. and
M.Sc. degree in Geology.

I have had problems since childhood where I would line up all my toys
and "rock" and "hum" to myself to derive comfort. This was always a
problem to my parents who pressurised me to behave "normally".

I never, ever, "get" the meaning of sarcasm and irony.

I cannot bear travelling on the tube, supermarkets, parties, and
suffer from concentration problems at work. I am over-sensitive to
noises, smells and visual patterns when I am travelling and can get
into dreadful "vomit panics" where I think I am going to be sick.
During a vomit panic I also lose my balance and find myself
vulnerable to theives and muggers.

My co-ordination is hopeless and I am forever missing kerbs,
stumbling and bumping into furniture.

So, what do I do? Is it worth getting an official diagnosis? How
can I get the appropriate support and assistance? What sort of job
should I do? How can I help my colleagues learn how to live with my
difficulties when I hardly understand them myself?