For a long time I felt I could find all the answers to the Why
Questions. After excepting that I didnt have to go through this
alone I receving some brillent councilling I relised some questions
you will never have the answers to. For your own preservation an
exceptance that you wont find all the answers has to be reached.

If i didnt look after me i couldnt look after my kids wealthfare so
it was important to reach a state of equalbrium for their sakes.
Thats why the councilling was so important.

Take offers of help and seak out help from your GP.