Just joined the group, its about 12:30am... and am yawning hehe. I
have had ocd since about the age of six years old. I can remember
the moment it started happening. For many years til the age of 23 it
was a dark secret that i hid from everyone, although through growing
up, it was noticed, but it was never understood. I was treated as if
i had done something wrong and was punished for it. Then was watched
like a hawk to see if i was doing or saying these strange things. So
through fear i buried it within, only skin deep. It still controlled
my life and everthing i did. Only pretending that it didnt when i
was watched, the stress was so painful, i would go back and do what
i had to do in secret. Rituals, touching objects in certain orders,
counting and targeting, playing images and phrases in my mind.
Fainting through exhaustion of completing tasks. I just wanted to
feel positive, and good within, to counteract the pain of negative
feelings. But this is the big con the mind is telling you. I feel it
has taken a huge part of my life away. Effecting everypart of my
life. Cutting a long story short, eventually over time i will tell
more.

I eventually found out what it was, when i read one of my parents
antidepressant drug leaflets, Seroxat. I couldnt believe it. This
had become a normal part of mylife, a part of my identity, i didnt
know what to do with this knowledge quite scary really, it wouldnt
be for another 5 years till i would be treated medically for this.
Even though i was recieving therapy, for at least 2 years! i know
mad hey! I was lucky to get someone to take me seriously. Even
though if you have had it for many years, its not too late as i have
found out! The average length of time OCD sufferers take to
eventually get help is 17 years. There is hope.

I hope this helps anyone, lots to share.
Robb