My wife is now accepted as a British citizen with a Blair/Blunket official
'presentation' and 'celebration' at the local Blairstapo headquarters - sorry
Town Hall where she has to swear to launch a shoulder born rocket at Windsor
Castle and all that crap!

She will then be officially allowed to stagger along the sea front at Southend
or Weymouth in union jack shorts, can of lager in one hand, bag of chips in the
other, and vomit all over the place just like us real Brits.

The official wording will amuse you as much as it amuses me:
Oath of allegiance: I (name) swear by almighty god that on becoming a British
citizen, I will be faithful and bear true allegiance to her majesty queen
Elizabeth the second, her heirs and successors, according to law. I will give
my loyalty to the United Kingdom and respect its rights and freedoms. I will
uphold its democratic values. I will observe its laws faithfully and fulfil my
duties and obligations as a British citizen.

This of course includes arriving on the shores of foreign lands, bible in one
hand and musket in the other saying to the natives: "You likee plenty beads?
Great White Queen likee plenty phosphates." The natives, thinking we were mad
wanting heaps of fermented bird shit, of course put their X on the piece of
paper and so we acquired continents full of bird shit, minerals, food, oil, and
lots and lots of employees for the railways, buses and hospitals. It also
includes clubbing the heads off Tasmanian babies buried in the sand until there
were no more pure blooded Tasmanians left on the planet, and shooting unarmed
women and children in the back at Amritsar, and similar civilising missions all
over the globe.

I have a Jobseeker's interview later today and hope I can get a job without
getting my head bashed all over again.

Love, Peace and Friendship from Brian Mitchell.

And remember that:

"The most remarkable thing about the world is that you can understand it."
(Einstein.)

And:

"They shouldn't be killing all those rhinos." (Kylie Minogue when asked (during
apartheid) what she thought about the situation in South Africa.)

And:

Einstein also said that the two most common elements on earth are oxygen and
stupidity.

He might have also said you can't win em all?!

But we have the potential to win most of them. It's up to people like us and
Einstein.


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